And it is that time again for another entry for Artefact motherhood, a beautiful blog circle which is a collaboration of artists & mothers from around the world sharing stories of the joys and struggles of our journey. These are more than photographs with dates written on the back. These are the artefacts we are leaving behind for children and the generations to come. Please have a look through mine and then check out the next artist in our circle.
I can't believe that it's been one week today that Forrest entered our lives. It's gone by way too quickly, I wish there was a way to slow down these fleeting newborn days. I am taking everything in. I've completely lost track of time and days, this past week has just been about following his lead. I feel surprisingly good today, not even that tired even though I haven't really slept in a week, it's all that oxytocin flowing through me. I'm up feeding him about every hour and a half during the night. He's such a scrumptious little one and for the past two nights the only way he'll sleep is if he's on my chest and I don't mind in the slightest as I love being heart to heart with him and everytime I'm feeding him I see you and daddy having the best cuddles. You awoke at 5:30 and the first thing you did was give me and Forrest a morning cuddle and a kiss and then without me even needing to ask for your help you got cosy in my lap and helped me with my engorged boob. For some reason Forrest prefers my right one leaving my left one to get really uncomfortable but thankfully you love helping me and always seem to know when it needs you.
Daddy has been so incredible all week, really taking good care of all of us even though he's been so tired the last few days but hasn't been able to sleep properly because he's been so busy doing things for us so this morning you me and Forrest got up to give him a chance to catch up on some sleep. The first thing we needed to do was change Forrest's nappy and you love helping me clean his cute little bum, you have been such an incredible big sister, you've blown me away with how great you've been! It was love at first sight for you both, you just love to hold him, cuddle him, and kiss him.
At the moment most of my time is spent sitting on the couch or in bed nursing Forrest or with him just laying in my lap. You've been really into music and have been putting on little dance shows for me. You really like to rock out to the girl bands, you're still very much into No Doubt and Veruca Salt and the Distillers. But you also love relaxing music too and there's this new album by Lisa Gerrard and David Kuckhermann that you're really into as well. You are so sweet and really wanted to do skin on skin with Forrest this morning but I thought it was a tad bit too cold but you were just as happy having him on your chest with clothes on, you even said that you never want to stop cuddling him. I can't believe I had even the slightest worry about how it would affect you and my relationship because it's become even better.
Unfortunately my birth didn't go quite as planned and I ended up needing stitches, not from a new cut or tear, I actually gave birth naturally without any pain relief but my old episiotomy scar ripped open and it took three hours for the midwife to stitch it back up. And now the wound has been gaping and since Saturday I've been needing to soak gauze with this special liquid and place it on the wound for 30 min three times a day. And since I can't see or reach comfortably daddy has been doing it for me, he really is the greatest guy ever.
Daddy has been on a deep cleaning mission this weekend and today he finished the upstairs. Once our bedroom was cleaned you me and Forrest went and relaxed on our bed, it's the only place in the house that gets some decent winter sun and since Forrest has a bit of jaundice he needs to sunbathe as much as he can. There was a moment when he began crying and you instinctively placed your hand on his chest and immediately he stopped crying and the look you had on your sweet little face in this moment was just incredible!! You looked so proud, then you ran off to tell daddy and to help him with the hoovering but then you heard him cry again and you came rushing back saying, "He needs me! He needs me!" You and Forrest are making my heart burst.
We had a visit from one of the midwives today and she was so lovely! Could have chatted with her for ages! She came to see how Forrest's jaundice was doing and she thought he looked absolutely fantastic and she also checked out my stitches and I'm so thrilled that it is back to healing and is looking really good and she was super impressed with my milk supply and was certain that Forrest must have regained all his weight. You adored her and had lots of fun going through her bag & grabbing the stethoscope and blood pressure tool and all sorts of other things, you even found a knitted boob which you especially loved. When it was time for her to leave you had to walk her to the door and give her a kiss and cuddle. You also told us that you want to be a midwife, I think that role would really suit you.
Afterwards it was all about your baby doll and you were being so sweet and as I was nursing Forrest you began to nurse as well. And then you gave your baby to daddy so he could burp him. You really seem to have grown up and changed so much in this last week! You are such a joy to experience, we love the thoughts you have and the way you express things, you really are such a gift. Both you and Forrest are our greatest gifts and blessings.
Forrest had fallen asleep and you requested an episode of Hilda and it felt so special to have this one on one time with you, we made popcorn and snuggled up on the couch exactly like we used to do. Daddy was still busy cleaning, he's been at it all day now! I can't believe how much better our space feels, so incredibly grateful for him! I have not done anything to help, I've just been lounging around either resting or nursing, but not much of anything else!
And I couldn't quite believe it but you ended up falling asleep in my lap while helping me once again sort out my very engorged boob! It was only 16:30, you haven't had a nap in forever let alone one in my arms! It truly gave me the best feeling in the world and it felt quite surreal having both you and your brother next to me. I could not get you to wake up for the life of me and instead daddy woke you up once he got back from the shop and it was the sweetest thing I've ever seen, he was so gentle and loving and you responded so positively and just crawled into his arms (usually it's never a positive experience if we need to wake you up). He managed to inspire you to wake up by asking if you wanted to help make dinner and a smoothie.
After dinner it was the usual rhythm of bath and bed although since Forrest's arrival everything has become much later and it's been daddy giving you your bath and reading your stories. Me and Forrest have been hanging out downstairs, mostly with him nursing or just sleeping on my chest, I am loving these days, these fleeting moments with him being so little, I remember when you were this little and it was just as magical. But the best thing now has to be experiencing a shared love with you.
About an hour after you had fallen asleep you woke up and only wanted me. I ended up in bed nursing both you and Forrest, you gave me the best cuddle and it was perfect timing because I really needed your help with draining my boob again. You've been wanting to nurse more and more since Forrest arrived. Afterwards with Forrest asleep on my chest, you just wrapped your arms around me and fell asleep in the sweetest way, I really relished in this cuddle because I've been beginning to really miss you, daddy's been getting most of the cuddles from you this past week. We are all going through such big transitions but so far this first week as a family of four has gone really amazingly.
Please check out Lauren, the next incredibly talented artist in our Artefact Motherhood blog circle at: https://laurenwebsterphotography.com/2019/02/01/an-interview-with-my-daughter and continue through all the artists until you get back to me!
to learn more about Artefact Motherhood please visit https://artifactmotherhood.com